Following the success of my last series, I decided that I wanted to share the stories of other inspirational Independent Mothers. I know that there are so many strong Independent Mothers in the world with an incredible story to tell and that many people could benefit from hearing their stories.
I am hoping that this series will help you to realise that you are not alone, you are much stronger than you think and that you will be able to navigate through this chapter in your life. It takes strength, perseverance and courage to get through, but I believe that you possess these qualities and much more!
I love to connect with Independent Mothers and to read everyone comments and stories about their own experiences with Motherhood.
If you would like to be involved in my Independent Mother series, please feel free to contact me at: email@example.com.
"My name is Wytesha. I am a single mom of my two year old daughter, Tylani Joy. I am totally in love with Jesus and have a passion to share His Gospel every day of my life. My hobbies are reading, travelling, and cooking."
1. How did you settle into your new role as an Independent Mum?
At first it was very difficult. I didn’t want to be a single mom, or at least what I thought a single mom was. I thought becoming a single mom meant that I could not pursue my dreams and passions. I also didn’t know how my daughter and I would make it financially, but Jesus has been our provider every step of the way. Slowly, everything started coming together, I wasn’t afraid to be alone anymore. I wasn’t afraid of what would happen to my daughter and I, I knew God would always provide. This journey has had a lot of ups and downs, but I have learned to keep going no matter what, because of Christ.
2. From your perspective, what are the joys and lows of being an Independent Mum to your daughter?
The joys of being an Independent Mum are the unconditional love you get from your little one, the smiles, the laughter, the fun you can create right in your home. I believe the lows are that sometimes this journey can seem lonely, when you haven’t found the right person to spend your life with, but it is all perspective. For those lonely days, I just get around the people who love me and shift my perspective.
3. I understand that you chose not to put your daughter into a childcare establishment, what influenced your decision?
Trust. I have heard terrible stories about the type of child abuse in the childcare establishments in my area. So, I just don’t trust them with my child. I have been blessed with parents that help me with my daughter, and I know I can trust them. They treat her with love and care better than any childcare establishment ever could.
4. I agree, I decided not to put my daughter into any childcare establishment because of the same reasons. I kew that nobody else would give my daughter the same amount of love, care and attention that I would and that is facts! As Mothers naturally we want the very best (and no less) for our children. Do you feel that there is enough support for Independent Mothers? What support would you like to see in the future?
I feel that we have more resources now than ever before. Before, if you were a single mom, you didn’t have an option of working from home. With the advancements in technology, I think that anything an Independent Mom sets her mind to do, she can achieve it. But there is always room for more support for each mother’s individual situation.
5. Who are your biggest supporters?
My mom, my sister, and my best friends: Jade and Rachel.
6. How has being an Independent mother changed you?
I have definitely become more driven and more focused. I have a little one watching what I do every day. She will not just model what I tell her to do, she will do what I do. So, I am careful to make the type of decisions that I would want her to make. I am also mindful of speaking life to her every day, she needs to hear at home that she is beautiful, smart, loved, and that God has a plan and purpose for her life. If she doesn’t hear those things from me, who can I expect to tell her those things?
7. Right, that is very true. Our home is the first school our children will ever attend, what we teach them will stay with them forever. It is important to always speak life into them, into situations and into ourselves. What stereotypes have you faced as an Independent mother?
So many! *eye roll* One of the most interesting stereotypes I have faced has been in dating. I have been treated like I should be desperate and accept any man that comes my way because I am a single mother. As if single mothers are damaged, discounted goods. I reject that stereotype the most because, we as single mothers are beyond valuable. We never have to settle in love!
8. I recall someone actually telling me when my daughter was a baby, "because you have a daughter you will find it harder to meet someone!" Of course I rebuked what this person was saying because it is not true. God's plan is far greater than we can ever fathom, I do not listen to negative talk at all - it is beyond me! What advice would you give to other women who have just become Independent mothers?
Don’t be hard on yourself for any reason. Sometimes we can feel guilt because this or that didn’t go as planned, but we are strong, capable, and our kids love us. Remember what is important. Stay around your support group. If you don’t have a support group, find one, even if it’s a facebook group. Do something that makes you smile and laugh every day. Days can get tough, and life happens, but always make time to smile and laugh.
9. Please tell us more about your platform?
I started a YouTube channel about a year ago. The channel is Single Christian Mom Chronicles. On the channel I discuss dating, sexual purity, bible study, Christ-focused living, and parenting.I also have a new podcast called, Single Christian Mom Chronicles. You can find it on Spotify now. It will be on other major podcast apps soon.Lastly, I have a Instagram page where you can find pictures of my every day life as a mom and inspirational Christian posts to encourage you on your walk with Christ.
10. How do you make being a mother whilst running your platform?
When I am overwhelmed, the one I go to first is Jesus. I lay out all my frustrations at His feet. I also call up my best friends, my mom, or my sister.
11. What are the positives and negatives of being a stay at home working mum?
When you work where you live and sleep, things can sort of run together. So, I make sure that my work area is separate from my living area, and I make sure my work area is closed off and can signal to my brain that work is done for the day. The other thing I am learning to try to do, especially since it is summer here, always make time to go outside and get fresh air.
12. What motivates you and who is your greatest inspiration?
Elizabeth Elliot is my one of my greatest inspirations, she inspires me to have a life of total surrender to Christ. My favorite quote from her is: “The fact that I am a woman does not make me a different kind of Christian, but the fact that I am a Christian makes me a different kind of woman.”
13. What does a typical day in your shoes look like?
I am always running around trying to meet my deadlines, while also trying to slow down and live in the moment. None of my days really look the same.
14. What is your favourite thing to do after a long day to unwind?
To unwind, I love to grab a cup of hot mint tea and read a good book, with my feet propped up and a mint skin mask on my face.
15. As a busy mum, what are your must-have beauty products?
Mascara. I don’t know what it is about mascara but I have to have it. I can go without all other beauty products but my mascara is my favourite lol! I also love to have my mint skin mask by Queen Helene.
16. What 5 items do you refuse to leave your house without?
Diaper bag (laughs), my purse, my mascara, toddler snacks, and my phone
17. What is next for you, your daughter and your platform?
Right now, I am not sure. I am looking into travelling more, and doing an international trip with my daughter, but that will be in quite a few months.
18. Finally, please tell us where we can find you on the internet?
You can find me on Instagram @SingleChristianMomChronicles
YouTube at Single Christian Mom Chronicles
and on Spotify at Single Christian Mom Chronicles.
Also my website: https://wyteshaunderwood.wixsite.com/website
Thank you Wytesha for sharing your story with us. I love your courage and your strength. I also admire the way you talk so passionately about the Lord. Always be encouraged!
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