Following on from my previous blog post: Independent And Powerful – Embracing Your Season Of Independence, which you can read here, these are the go-to bible verses, just for you to reflect on in times of need. I want you to be reminded of God’s word at all times, so when any thoughts enter your head regarding your Independent Mother status, you can shut them down one by one with God’s word. Be encouraged always!
1. “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” – 2 Corinthians 6:14.
As mentioned earlier, you cannot entertain just anyone and in the same way, you cannot be with just anyone. You are a Queen and Queens never settle because they are royalty. Your father in heaven is a King and your husband to be will also be a King. Anyone wanting your time has to prove that they are worth your time. What does his prayer life say about him? How does he treat his family and loved ones? What are his goals and aims in life? What is his personality like when he is with you and those who know him better than you? These are some of the many questions you should ask yourself before even bothering to waste your time. Your time is precious, he needs to be worth every ounce of your time before he gets it.
2. “Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.” – Matthew 6:33.
How can you know who God has set aside for you if you do not spend time with God? Putting that aside, God will not be giving you anything unless you spend time with Him, not just for your gain, but seeking to develop a genuine relationship with Him. Remember God knows your heart and He knows if you are being genuine with Him or not. There is much to gain by spending time with God, you gain a lifelong father and a friend who always has your back. You gain stability, consistency and someone who will never leave you when you need Him. God rewards His children for their faithfulness and once you have Him in your life, everything else that you once thought you needed will fall into second place. He is the greatest, He will get you when nobody else gets you and you do not need to pretend with Him, just be yourself, be real – He loves you as you are.
3. “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens,” – Ecclesiastes 3:1.
There is so much that you could be doing as you are in your season of Independence. You have so many opportunities to discover more about yourself, to focus on God’s calling for your life and to enjoy your child(ren) because one day you will be a wife and you will have so many responsibilities. During your season of Independence ask God what He will have you do and ask Him what He wants you to learn from this season. We all experience different seasons in our lives, seasons of joy, seasons of sorrow, seasons of growth, seasons of opportunities and seasons of challenges, etc. God is teaching you in each season you encounter, because there is always a lesson to be learnt, there is always something that He wants you to take away and implement into the next season you will experience.
4. “…An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world--how she can please her husband.” – 1 Corinthians 7:34.
Do you note from this scripture how the unmarried woman and the married woman’s agendas vary? Rather than editing that part out to focus primarily on the unmarried woman, I kept it there for you to reflect on. As a married woman, your duties will change and you will understandably think about ways you can be a better wife to your husband, but that should not be at the forefront of your mind all of the time. As an unmarried woman, you should be focusing on the Lord and doing His work. Your life should be dedicated to the Lord and you should strive to please Him above everyone else in your day to day ventures. Keep this same mentality when you get married and know that God comes before your husband – that should never change. You will never worship your husband; you will always worship God. When you have such a mentality to please God, ultimately you will know how to also please your husband because God will show you how to be a better wife. Your husband will be a man of God, so He will understand why God is so important to you.
5. "I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” – John 15:5.
A perfect reminder that without God in our lives, there is no happy ending. God can give us the good desires of our heart if we only trust in Him and believe that He will make it happen. God wants all of His children to bear fruit because we are set apart, we are different to those who are in the world.
“But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!” – Galatians 5:22-23.
Ask yourself as an Independent woman, “what fruit am I bearing?” Work on bearing the above fruits of the Spirit rather than focusing on worldly pleasures. Your mission every single day should be to die to self and allow the Holy Spirit to show you the way you should be living. We should automatically know what is expected of us and do it.
5a. Seeking to love others as Christ loves you is a big one and something that takes some practice, but being kind gets your further in life than being unkind to others –
“Keep on loving each other as brothers and sisters. Don’t forget to show hospitality to strangers, for some who have done this have entertained angels without realizing it!” – Hebrews 13:1-2.
“This is my commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you.” – John 15:12.
5b. Learning to live with joy, peace and harmony will help your life to be better because you will feel God's perfect peace within your life. Even when difficult situations arise you will handle the situations differently. Your peaceful presence will leave others with the same peace, it is a beautiful thing, learn to master it –
“When you obey my commandments, you remain in my love, just as I obey my Father’s commandments and remain in his love. I have told you these things so that you will be filled with my joy. Yes, your joy will overflow!” – John 15:10-11.
You should be patient and not try to rush ahead of God – “God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.” – James 1:12.
5c. You should be kind, not just with your words, but with your actions also –
“When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness.” – Proverbs 31:26.
“She extends a helping hand to the poor and opens her arms to the needy.” – Proverbs 31:20.
5d. As per point 5a, love others as Christ loves us. Strive to be good to others and to yourself; run from sin and stay on the right path. Strive to live and righteous, holy and honest life –
“You must not have any other god but me. You must not make for yourself an idol of any kind or an image of anything in the heavens or on the earth or in the sea. You must not bow down to them or worship them, for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God who will not tolerate your affection for any other gods…Exodus 20:3-17. (The Ten Commandments)
- These all may seem extreme to someone who is new to the word of God, but a lot of what is mentioned above are principles that most of us already uphold, such as not worshiping false idols, not stealing, not murdering, etc.
“So, I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves. The sinful nature wants to do evil, which is just the opposite of what the Spirit wants. And the Spirit gives us desires that are the opposite of what the sinful nature desires. These two forces are constantly fighting each other, so you are not free to carry out your good intentions, but when you are directed by the Spirit, you are not under obligation to the law of Moses. When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarrelling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.” – Galatians 5:16-21.
5e. Remain faithful and trust that God has got you no matter what you go through, God is not giving up you that easily –
“Then Jesus told them, “I tell you the truth, if you have faith and don’t doubt, you can do things like this and much more. You can even say to this mountain, ‘May you be lifted up and thrown into the sea,’ and it will happen. You can pray for anything, and if you have faith, you will receive it.” – Matthew 21:21-22.
5f. Try to be gentle in spirit and in your approach with others and in general. Everyone is facing their own trials and tribulations, try not to be the person who adds to other people's problems because of how you talk and treat others. If you can be anything in the world, be kind and treat others as you would like to be treated –
“Since God chose you to be the holy people He loves, you must clothe yourselves with tender-hearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony and let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.” – Colossians 3:12-15.
5g. Exercise and maintain self-control, you are not worldly, so you need not behave as such. Though we all fall short of God's grace from time to time, pray and ask God for forgiveness. Dust yourself off and try again, you'll get it eventually, be patient with yourself –
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” – 2 Timothy 1:7.
“In view of all this, make every effort to respond to God’s promises. Supplement your faith with a generous provision of moral excellence, and moral excellence with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with patient endurance, and patient endurance with godliness and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love for everyone.” – 2 Peter 1:5-7.
What scriptures do you turn to regularly for encouragement? Leave a comment below!